Daniella | Brooke Moore
Seeing the “homes” that so many Dominicans live in completely changed my view of poverty. For long as I can remember, I’ve known about poverty in these developing countries. Involving the hunger, broken down homes created from scraps, along with children roaming these dangerous roads. But hearing about this situation is one thing, but actually being there is a totally new thought process.
Watching these barefoot, half clothed children, running around, laughing while living in such a horrific, simply boggles my mind. At first I had no idea that my afternoon would be filled with sorrow and my heart simply breaking for these children. I thought my group of four and I were going for a nice little walk, but before I knew it, I was down one road and then next, and into a whole different world.
There is honestly nothing I love more than children and interacting with them. Seeing them in such an environment literally broke right through me. Having multiple children reach for me, while already grasping the three children’s hands in each of my hands. Children just grabbing at me and holding up and down my arms, just to get some sense of reaction from me.
Meeting Daniella today was one of the most amazing and heartbreaking moments I have ever encountered. The love I have towards this child I have only known for simply minutes is incomprehensible. With all the other children running from one ‘Americano’ to another, Daniella never left my side or the grip of my hand. Picking Daniella up and feeling how tight she held her arms and legs around my body, was as is I was to never let her go. Nothing has ever felt so right in my eyes. Having this child with nothing more than the clothes on her back and tin walls made from garbage for a home, is honestly the toughest thing I have ever experienced.
While walking through the village I ended up meeting Daniella’s mom, grandma, and baby brother. Seeing the home that these four share, if not more, was simply nothing I have ever pictured. There is a huge difference between the things we see on tv and the real experience of being here. Breathing the air, walking on the garbage which covers the roads and holding these precious babies that have next to no chance at a better life. This truly pulls on my heart like never before.
Saying goodbye to Daniella, like never a goodbye before. Putting her down and waving goodbye was hard enough, but having this child with nothing, instantly grab my hand to not go was the worst feeling ever. Her eyes looking into mine wishing me to stay broke me. Where is she to go, when she’s basically all alone in this world. I walked with her as far as I could. Finally gave one last wave, broke all connection with her tiny body and simply walked away with tears pouring from my eyes. I couldn’t turn back to see her one more time, with the fear of running back to have her in my arms again. Once behind the gates of the school I was assigned to teach next, I saw her. Watching me, staring at me as if I had abandoned her. Not understanding a thing at all. Feeling my stomach drop while waving to her from across bars and watching her just walk away without an emotion in the world.
Throughout my entire trip into this village everything just seems so real now. From the literally shocking poverty, to the joy that these children portray. Simply unbelievable.
From the moment of taking a five month baby from a eight year olds arms my emotions have gone insane, with the effect of my hear slowing breaking. Throughout my entire time within the village, I simply couldn’t stop bawling my eyes out. Crying for these children and the life they are forced to live. With next to no way out. Just telling Daniella, ‘te amo’ over and over again. Trying to put some emotion into this precious child.
Having the constant image of these children in my mind is a never ending pit in my stomach. Having the love for a child I’ve spent two hours of my life with and having her gone is simply terrible in my eyes. Knowing from Rachael that I will see my Dominican angel again is overwhelming, both good and bad. Daniella is one of the children in this village that is sponsored by compassion. At one point or another I will have her wrapped around me again. Feeling the love from one another through a simple smile is enough. Although having to say goodbye again will be treacherous. Knowing that maybe she’ll forget me or not want me will honestly break my heart. The impact that this one child had given me is crazy and I’m unable to explain. The thought of her rejecting me is hard, although she is a child as any other child around the world. They have moments and changes everyday. A person’s a person no matter how big or small. And sometimes it’s hard to remember that these people in such terrible situations are made exactly the same as us.
I just wonder why God places these amazing children in such terrible places. Why do American kids, or even deeper, my nieces get to grow up and live in such a different and richer lifestyle. To me that doesn’t seem fair or even remotely right. Growing up, I would throw around the phrase, “That’s not fair!” While my mother would remark back, “Life’s not fair.” Before seeing what I have, I never really thought anything of it. But truly life is not fair and I realize how ridiculous I am being when contemplate the Americanized fairness of daily life. God doesn’t make mistakes. I just wonder why.Why place Your finest creation in such a terrible life and environment with next to no way out? Why?
I love this child and I never wanted to let her go. Knowing the situation that she lives in and the ‘normal’ Dominican life set out for her is awful. Although, I will pray for this little girl and hope she will be one of the few that has a chance at a better life. I now realize how important education and a new start is so important for success, especially in developing countries. Prayers, smiles and love is about all I can give these children and that’s exactly what I am doing. I want to watch this poor natation be built up.
The love I have for Daniella is a love like never before and I love I will never lose or simply forget.
“There is hope for the helpless.
Rest for the weary.
And love for the broken hearted.
There is grace and forgiveness.
And mercy and healing.
He’ll lead you to wherever you are.
CRY OUT TO JESUS.”
–Third Day
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