Saturday, 21 March 2015

The Orphanage l Julianna

Going to the orphanage was a lot different than I expected.  Previously, I had read blog posts from students that had written about their experiences.  One student had described her experience as a big faith rocker that made her emotional and question many things.  Other students had described the orphanage as a very happy place that they couldn’t wait to go back to.  Rachael had told us the night before, not to have expectations going into the orphanage.  That has been the advice for most of the trip, since most things don’t turn out to be what you expect them to be.  However, it’s hard to listen to that advice after hearing a lot about people’s experiences.  Really, the only thing I was 100% sure of when going to the orphanage, was that the bus ride was going to take 2 hours...and it did.

When we arrived at the orphanage and pulled through the cheerfully painted gates, we stepped off the bus and were greeted by two boys.  Tomei, a boy that I had heard a lot about from previous people, ran up and hugged Rachael.  While I was carrying the cooler into the main building, a boy in purple crocks tried to make me carry him as well.  I almost dropped both him and the cooler before he ran and found someone else. 

Before we got to the orphanage, everyone was assigned partners. I was with Luke.  After we had dropped off our stuff, Luke and I joined some kids that were playing with cars and lego in the main area.  Luke started playing with a girl named Acobie and the two of them became friends instantly.  The boy I was with was named Josiar (sounded like Jose).  At the beginning, I was mostly just putting blocks together that he would disassemble as soon as I gave them to him.  Whenever Luke would tickle Acobie or run a car through her hair, they would both burst in a fit of laughter.  When I tried that with Josiar he looked at me for a brief second and then went back to his lego.  So we continued to sit in silence while Josiar rolled cars across the floor tiles.  The place we were sitting, connected to a wheelchair ramp further down the hall.  When someone wanted to get by, Josiar did not want to move, so I picked him up and moved him aside.  Big Mistake!  It may not have looked like it when you were sitting with Josiar, mostly because if he didn’t take the lego in your hand, he would just ignore you, but as soon as you picked him up, he would cling to you like a leach.  It wasn’t a bad thing, just completely unexpected.  From that point on, Josiar would always wanted to be picked up and if I didn’t carry him he would wrap around my leg while I walked.  It was incredibly tiring because Josiar was not a light kid, but I’m glad my experience with him got past the point of sitting in silence.

The other girl I met, after Josiar had ran off, was named Joli(yo-lee).  When I first met Joli, I thought she was a boy.  All the kids in the orphanage have their hair cut short because it is easier for the nurses to maintain.  Unless you can tell by their names, you really have no idea with the younger kids.  Anyways, while I was walking to catch up with Josiar, Joli came up behind me, held my hand and started walking.  For the longest    time, I thought she was around 13 or 14 years old, maybe even 10, but one of the nurses said she was “dieciocho”, eighteen.  Joli didn’t even come up to my chest.  She didn’t talk, just smiled, and would clench tighter when you tried to let go.

Before lunch, I found Luke in Acobie’s room.  Her room was off to the side with rows and rows of cribs where other girls slept (or lived in some cases).  Acobie really liked being in charge.  She loved colouring and would not stand for people not being part of the fun.  At first she would just say “aqui” (here) and point to the spot beside her, but then she wanted us to be closer.  Acobie made us lay on our fronts and rest on our elbows, shoulder to shoulder with each other.  When we thought it couldn’t be anymore squished, Luke, Alexa, Marieke and I were shoved together courtesy of Acobie.  Then she ordered us to lay shoulder to shoulder on our backs in front of the wall.  Acobie, I think, was really into wrestling, because out of nowhere, she took a running start and body slammed Luke.  We all laughed really hard until we remembered Acobie includes everybody in her fun, and she jumped on all of us as well.

After lunch, we didn’t have to stick to our partners.  Rachael said it was like that at the beginning so we could feel more comfortable and could talk to someone if we needed it.  Since Luke wanted to stay in the nursery, Joey, Bae and I went upstairs where the older kids lived.  Again, it is not good to have expectations.  “The Upstairs” had been described to me as kind of intimidating, as a lot of the boys were older and bigger than a lot of the girls in our group and would come towards you really fast.  It didn’t really help my “no expectations” motto when the gate that led to the upstairs had a padlock on it. Most of the rooms we went in, the kids were sleeping.  The room closest to the stairs already had one of the chaps, Brian, in it, so we decided to go in there.  When I got there a lot of the boys in this room were also sleeping, except for one boy named Benito.  Benito looked 18 from the waist up, as he had facial hair and his face had matured.  He was a lot shorter than me though.  His waist down was a lot smaller than the rest of his body which is why he only came up to my chest.  I held his hands to help him walk around his room but as soon as I let him go I was suprised to see he had his own method of transportation.  He would walk like a monkey on all fours.  It was amazing how fast he could go.  Benito was always smiling and when he came back he would sit down and clap in enjoyment.

When I came to the nursery, the majority of our group was already in there.  All the kids that weren’t sleeping were interacting with the other students in our group.  Luke, Ashley  and a few other students were sitting against the wall craddling babies in their arms.  Most people, once they find a kid they connect with, it is hard to seperate them.  Since I didn’t want to try and test that theory, I walked around before I saw a baby lying in his crib.  On the side of his crib, like all of the cribs in their orphanage, had his name written in black letters.  Gabriel Eduardo.  Gabriel was still sleeping when I pulled up a chair beside his crib.  When I stuck my finger in, his tiny hand wrapped around it.  Monica (VanLuyk) was also sitting with Gabriel.  We found it weird how when he was sleeping, he didn’t look like anything was wrong with him.  He would shift in his sleep and gurgle the way any other baby would.  Maybe he was just left here, but I found it odd how a baby that looked like any other was here instead of with a family.  Maybe it is unfair or just the way life is, either way, I thought about it the whole time I was with Gabriel.  After he woke up, I held him for a bit while sitting in a chair.  Lauren and Marieke came by and asked if “there was a line to hold him” so I had to say goodbye to Gabriel.  Most people in our group had found kids they liked to be around.  Jason didn’t know whether or not he could pick up a baby out of its crib so he climbed in and fell asleep holding it.  Other girls stayed with the same kid the whole day, sitting next to their crib even if they didn’t give the response most of us would have wanted. 


At circle time that night, it was really confusing for me.  Being at the orphanage had been such a positive experience for me and with carrying and hugging so many kids, I don’t think I could have been sad.  When other people told about their experiences in the orphanage, it was hard to sit around.  People that looked so happy and were laughing the entire day were not now because “it was hard to say goodbye”.  Some people said their experience made them question their faith and why kids have to live like that.  For me, I never had those thoughts in the orphanage.  I was expecting to but I didn’t.  The only question I asked after circle time was “Why am I not feeling that way”.  Rachael explained to us that everyone will react and in the past have reacted differently to the orphanage.  You may have your eyes open to something you’ve never thought of before or you may not have been affected at all, it just depends on who you are and the day you had.  There were some things I saw at the orphanage that I wish wasn’t what those kids had to live with, but I’m glad I was able to see them.  Because maybe if they didn’t have the disability they had, I wouldn’t have had the experience that I had.  It may not be clear why these kids have to live like this but for me it is clear why they have a reason to live.  In class we talk about “what is a meaningful life” and who can decide what is and isn’t.  There may not be one answer for that question but I know the experience that those kids showed me was incredibly meaningful.

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